


Putting the Fallen to Rest

by CostlyShadow (Shadowcat_2008)



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/F, Memorials, Spacer (Mass Effect), Vanguard (Mass Effect), War Hero (Mass Effect)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-04-14
Packaged: 2018-10-03 23:11:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10261067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowcat_2008/pseuds/CostlyShadow
Summary: After dealing with the events of Noveria, Shepard and Liara go to Thessia to put Benezia to rest. We start the scene on Thessia at the T'soni estate. More chapters to come, I just have to proofread them first.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction so I hope you all like it. I am open to any and all constructive criticism as this is the first time that I have written anything like this and would love to improve my writing. 
> 
> My Shepard is a Spacer, Vanguard, War Hero.
> 
> As always all characters depicted here are property of Bioware and the Mass Effect Franchise, I am just adding in some substance between the story line that we don't get to see in the play through of the trilogy. 
> 
> I decided to start with the events unfolding after Noveria and Benezia's death but I do plan on writing the events leading up to Noveria as well as after.

Shepard’s eyes snapped open, taking in the darkness of the room, listening for the muffled cries that roused her from sleep. Slipping off the couch a chill ran down her spine from the cold wood floor, her bare feet moved soundlessly, peering around the room. Taking slow strides toward the bed she gazed down upon a sleeping Asari with sheets tangled around her limbs and a fresh sheen of sweat upon her body. Her brow was furrowed and her nose and lips twitched as if she was experiencing something painful, underneath the blankets Shepard could tell that her arms were twitching as well, though less forceful than her face. She looked down upon the maiden with concern, I wonder what she is dreaming about, she thought to herself. A slight sigh escaped Shepard’s lips as her shoulders slouched, she could hear the asari talking into her pillow, muffled sounds, most not coherent words. Looking around the room once more to ensure all was well, she began to head back the couch when she heard a mumbled “Shepard”, and abruptly spun on her heels and sat on the edge of the bed, forehead wrinkled with concern. Reaching out she caressed Liara’s shoulder whispering “Liara, it’s ok. You’re safe here at home Blue, you’re only dreaming”, the caress enlisted a soft smile as the twitching in her face stopped. Pleased with the way Liara had begun to relax Shepard turned to get up, but Liara’s face twitched again, mumbling “Mother please” distress obvious in her voice, then suddenly she jolted up ramrod straight “No!” the unexpected cry enough to make Shepard flinch.  
  
Liara sat up in bed panting, her chest heaving roughly, pulling her knees up tight to her body and leaning forward to rest her elbows on them while both hands cupped her face. Shepard wrapped her in a strong hug and began to rub her back, offering as much comfort as she could  
“Blue, it’s ok, you’re safe, and it was only a dream”.  
  
Liara’s voice cracked as she stammered out “S-shepard?”  
  
Shepard flashed a lopsided grin and in that moment the bedroom door flung open, a fierce biotic display shimmering as a figure walked into the room. Shepard dropped the embrace, turning to face the intruder and was enveloped in a purple sheen, catching Shepard in a powerful biotic throw that sent her flying across the room. Relying on pure instinct Shepard caught her balance, flipping herself in midair to land crouched down on one foot, braced by her nimble fingers . In a flash Shepard pushed off the ground and was back on her feet, poised like a predator ready to strike, her fiery red hair falling partially over her eyes hiding a controlled rage bubbling below the surface, her biotic cornea flaring wildly around her body. Her weight shifted forward onto the balls of her feet, “Stop! Everything is fine, it’s ok” these simple words diffused Shepard but she didn’t let her biotics fall completely, leaving glowing blue wisps around her tightly clenched fists. Across the room she could see the blue of biotics fading from the intruder before the lights flashed on to reveal Shiala. Her face still hard, eyes narrowed in a fierceness mirroring Shepard’s, fist clenched but no longer burning with the fire of dark energy pulsating around them, she immediately relaxed upon seeing Shepard knowing her mistress was in no danger.  
  
Turning to Liara her eyes softened and she dropped her voice to one of submission, “Mistress, I heard you scream and when I entered - -“  
  
Liara steeled her voice “That’s enough Shiala, it was only a nightmare and the Commander was merely trying to comfort me. Thank you for your quick response but you are dismissed” her voice that of Lady T’soni instead of the shy young maiden.  
  
“Yes Mistress” Shiala left the room, shutting off the lights as she went.  
  
Shepard relaxed fully, letting the last wisps of biotic energy around her clenched fists dissipate as the door clicked shut.  
  
“Liara, are you sure you’re ok?”  
  
Shaken from the adrenaline in her system Liara’s voice was shaky, “Yes Shepard, all is fine. It was just a bad dream.”

  
“Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it, I know you must have been dreaming about your mother. You were talking in your sleep right before you woke up, I can tell something is wrong… you’re not a very good liar T’soni.”  
  
After a deep breath and a long sigh Liara’s postured relaxed and she once again slumped over, resting her elbows back on her knees and supporting her head with her clasped hands. “If you would like to talk about Benezia’s death, she brought it upon herself” The statement filled with a cold, calculating detachment.

  
Stepping closer to Liara Shepard furrowed her brows, her lips went slack and her eyes appeared darker and soft “Don’t pretend it doesn’t bother you, she was your mother.”

  
Without wavering and looking directly into Shepard’s face “She was, but she was not. I prefer to remember Benezia as she used to be, before she was corrupted by Sovereign’s power.”

  
Shepard reached out placing her hand on Liara’s left shoulder, her eyes shone a brilliant sea foam green, warm and welcoming; “The best of your mother lives on in you, her determination, her intelligence, her strength”

  
A brief sigh and an edge of hurt in her voice she dropped hear hands “That is kind of you to say, I appreciate your concern but I am fine. Benezia choose her path just as I have chosen mine. I am with you to the end Shepard.”

  
“It’s good to have you with us Liara” and with that Shepard dropped her hand from Liara’s shoulder and turned to walked back to her spot on the couch, laying down and falling quickly back into a shallow sleep.

  
Liara laid back down, straightening and smoothing out the silken covers, closing her eyes as soon as her head hit the soft pillow. In that moment Liara felt like she wanted to break, the dream had seemed so real, standing back on the platform of the research station on Noveria. She relived every agonizing moment facing her mother, how Benezia had almost killed her with biotically thrown crate. Liara marveled at her mother’s intense strength of will that allowed her to break free from Saren’s control for even the briefest of moments, how she used that last bit of control to aid Shepard and how she had told her that she always made her proud. The last moments of the dream, no nightmare, was that of the final killing shot, Benezia slumping back against the container, all of the strength in her muscles failing as her body went limp. Liara could see the raising of her chest fading away as she was drawing her final breaths, her skin paling with the lack of circulation, her normally expressive eyes turning dull and lifeless, but worst of all was the mind-numbing silence. The finality of death, of her mother’s death, was something she had not prepared herself for. She had always thought that one day she would reconcile, she would come home to her mother, that they would hug, reminisce, and share their lives, but now that could never be, the last hug already given, the last kiss on the cheek, the last words of wisdom, the last I love you, the last of everything had already been taken from her and her mother. The only solace that Liara could take from that moment was that she knew it had been Shepard who had taken that final shot instead of herself, for having her mother’s death on her hands would have completely undone her. Suddenly she missed having Shepard comforting hand caressing her shoulder and that warm embrace. A small sob escaped her throat.

  
Shepard sat up slowly, sleep still heavy in her eyes, rubbing them softly. In reality it had only been a few minutes but the lack of sleep that she had been getting as of late did her no favors

  
“Liara?” getting no response Shepard tried again “Blue, why don’t you come here, we can sit for a while.”

  
Those were secretly the words that Liara had been hoping for, an invitation to sit in Shepard’s comforting aura; slowly she got up throwing her legs to the side of the bed shivering slightly as the cold night air brushed against her. Shepard sat and extended her right arm as she was still blinking herself awake, willing her eyes to stay open a little longer, a clear invitation for Liara. Liara pressed up against Shepard with the side of her head relaxed against Shepard’s right shoulder as all of the tension in her body uncoiled, Shepard’s arm wrapping around her tightly as she caressed her shoulder and sat in silence. Words did not need to be spoken, Shepard felt how completely Liara relaxed into her embrace and soon she noticed the even and regular breathing confirming that Liara had fallen fast asleep in her arms. Out of reflex Shepard leaned her head over so that her right cheek rested atop of Liara’s crest, with a large sleepy yawn she too drifted off into sleep knowing that Liara was safe and comforted.


	2. Breakfast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2 at the T'Soni Estate, split into 2 chapters.

As the first signs of light began to peak into the room through the small gaps in the heavy curtains Shepard was waking. Morning came far too quickly and as Shepard lifted her head off from a still sleeping Liara’s crest she rolled it trying to work the kinks out of her neck from sleeping in that awkward position.  Though she was happy to help Liara settle and get some sleep, Shepard really wished that she could have gotten a good night’s rest. Though she had to admit, with Liara cradled up at her side she did avoid having any of her own nightmares about the Prothean’s untimely demise, which in its self was a victory since they seemed to haunt her on a nightly basis. Shepard was content to continue waiting for Liara to wake up on her own when a soft knock came from the door

“Mistress?” With a spark of recognition Shepard realized the voice belonged to Shiala. Shepard gently rubbed Liara’s shoulder

“Blue, it’s time to wake up. Shiala is right outside the door”

“mmmm” Liara murmured contently as she roused from sleep.

It took merely seconds for Liara to realize that she was sleeping pressed up against a pleasantly warm mass, as she opened her eyes the realization dawned on her that she was no longer sleeping in her own bed. Frantically her eyes darted around the room, I’m still in my room she thought, _but oh Goddess where am I? The couch? Shepard!_ Liara hesitantly looked up peering directly into Shepard’s shining sea foam green eyes. As their eyes connected Shepard could see shock reflected back in Liara’s deep blue eyes, suddenly she flinched back away from Shepard soundlessly. Shepard merely flashed a lopsided grin as Liara stammered out

“Shepard, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep” a deep purple blush was creeping up on Liara’s cheeks as she spoke, diverting her attention away from Shepard’s face and staring with increasing intensity at a spot on the floor.

“It’s ok Blue, but Shiala is at the door, you might want to answer.” Shepard smiled, _Damn, she’s cute when she’s flustered._

 Gathering up what was left of her pride she stood up, straightening out the wrinkles in her silk nightgown and answered “Yes Shiala?”

“Breakfast is being served Mistress”

“Thank you Shiala, I will be down momentarily” and with that Shiala silent walked away. If she noticed the blush on her Mistresses’ face or the winkles in her clothing she made no motion to make it known.

Liara turned to Shepard giving her a sheepish grin, “Well it looks as though we should get ready for breakfast, let me shower and then you can have the bathroom since I know you’re not going to leave me.”

With that Shepard couldn’t help but grin watching Liara walk away towards the bathroom. She started her normal morning workout routine, 5 sets of 20 sit ups and push-ups whilst Liara prepped for the day. No sooner than Shepard had finished her work out an acolyte entered the room. Her skin was a dark shade of violet, reminding her of Councilor Tevos, though unlike Tevos her facial markings stop abruptly above where her brow marking would be and were a vibrant cherry red, her crest an even deeper violet. She carried an elegant white traditional Asari gown featuring black trim and white opera length fingerless gloves. A look of surprise suddenly on her face as she noticed Shepard still sitting on the ground,

“I’m sorry Specter, I did not realize you were in here guarding the Lady T’soni” a slight nod from Shepard and the acolyte continued to the bed, laying out the dress delicately before turning and standing silently against the wall. Shepard only spared a glance at this new acolyte, studying the features about the matron’s face as well as the grace in which she presented herself. Obviously more confident in her station than Liara, and very gorgeous, although I’ve never seen an Asari that wasn’t gorgeous before Shepard thought, but she lacked all of Liara’s subtle beauty, the brush of dappled flecks below her eyes, the brightly colored blue of her skin, the awkward shyness of the young Archeologist that most appealed to her. Shepard found herself grinning just thinking about the young maiden.

With that Liara emerged from the bathroom, covered only in a towel, Shepard’s breath hitched suddenly at the sight of her long blue legs but recovered quickly, masking the look of desire that had appeared in her face with a neutral expression. Liara caught a glimpse of Shepard’s eyes which were far less quick to match her face, marveling in how deep and dark green they had appeared. She was unsure if it was because of the lighting or if Shepard’s eyes normally could change shades, she made a mental note to research that when she got the opportunity. Recovering from staring into Shepard’s eyes Liara managed a reply

“The bathroom is all yours Shepard”

With that Shepard sat up, grabbed her bag and headed into the bathroom, pausing before entering “You’re going to wait for me right? I might get lost if you don’t”

“Yes Shepard, I’ll still be here when you’re ready” and with that she closed the bathroom door.  

It was larger than she remembered from the night before, although she was unable to really explore the room before setting to sleep. Everything was as luxurious as if she were staying in an expensive hotel on the Citadel.  The room its self was at least as large as her personal cabin on the Normandy, with white and grey swirling marble floors, a round elevated bathtub against one wall, the opposite wall was framed by a long mirror and two large round vessel sinks. The outer wall of the room was a large wall length window that had already been darkened. Walking over to it and adjusting the settings Shepard could look out along the city scape of Armali, the brilliant soft Thessian sunrise was like that of Earth, only with more of a twinge of purple in the sky that took her breath away. Activity was already present in the bustling streets below and her lips curled upwards and parted at just the thought of seeing the city up close. Darkening the window again she walked to the corner shower and thanks to her N-school training was clean in record time. Deciding on casual wear so that she didn’t stick out like the sore thumb she was in a crowd of blue, she dressed in her blue jeans, a white t-shirt, her black leather N7 jacket with red trim and opted for a pair of tennis shoes instead of her combat boots. Hidden underneath the jacket was a tactical shoulder holster complete with her M-12 Locust SMG, since a Specter can never be without a weapon of course. As she exited the bathroom she took one glance at her toned figure in the mirror, the corner of her lips curling up slightly at the mere thought of what Liara would say.

Her eyes darted across the room looking for the familiar sight of the shy archeologist but to her dismay Liara was nowhere to be seen. She could see the end of the curtains wavering slightly as a cool breeze entered the room leaving a slight but pleasant chill causing Shepard to take a deep breath. The air smelled fresh and clean unlike what she was used to in Vancouver or other city bases that she had been too. She walked toward the curtains, brushing past the silky material the flowed like butter around her onto the enclosed balcony. She could hear the sounds of the city, muted as people went about their day, mothers on their way to work, children playing in the streets and parks below, lovers searching for quite places to whisper sweet words. The sun was blinding bright in comparison with the darkened room leaving Shepard’s eyes to adjust, the kiss from the warmth of the sun traveled through her body, her muscles relaxing and melting away the stress of recent events. As her eyes finally focused she saw a heavenly figure leaning against the railing, her eyes were shut but relaxed, the corner of her mouth curled upwards in a slight grin, face free from the wrinkles of worry, or anxiety. Taking in the full sight Shepard’s knees began to go weak, her palms sweaty, and mouth dry, a pang of desire shooting through her which made her barley able to think let alone stand. Liara was the picture of elegance and beauty, her long flowing white dress even more beautiful now that she was captured in the beautiful Thessian morning. As if she was able to sense Shepard’s loss of control Liara turned her head toward Shepard slowly opening her eyes as her lips parted slightly revealing an even brighter smile,

“Good morning Shepard.”

 As their eyes met Shepard was entranced by the beautifully bright blue eyes that had never looked more perfect; they practically shimmered in the sunlight that lite up Liara’s face that she got lost in them for a moment.

“Shepard? Are you alright?”

Snapping herself out of the trance she blinked her eyes whilst a small short gasp escaped her lips “What? Oh… I’m sorry Liara, yes everything is perfect. You look absolutely stunning this morning that dress looks amazing on you”

Shepard’s lips curled up higher as she shifted her head slightly to the side in a lopsided grin as she noticed Liara’s cheeks growing a darker shade of purple.

“Thank you Shepard” _Oh goddess, I hope she doesn’t realize what that smile does to me, and those eyes, could they look any more inviting then they do right now, so vibrant and alive_ “Should we go to breakfast?”

Shepard’s lips parted further showing a toothy exuberant grin, her eyes bright and round piercing straight to Liara’s soul leaving a fluttering sensation in the pit of her stomach. Bowing her head slightly Shepard stood straight bending her right elbow so that her hand was on her stomach, elbow out “It would be my honor to escort you my Lady, just tell me where to go”

Liara happily took the invitation and threaded her left arm through Shepard’s holding her elbow with her right hand gazing into her endearing green eyes “Right this way Shepard”

The trip to the dining room was without complication, though Shepard noticed a couple of the younger acolytes that they passed on the way hide shocked expressions as their eyes got wide which they quickly schooled. The events of the morning were in full swing, the commandos were coming and going from their shifts either just ending or starting. Reluctantly, not wanting to give up the close contact with Shepard, Liara dropped her arm, best not to give the commandos anything to gossip about today. The large double doors to the dining room looked to be made from a dark wood reminiscent of a deep walnut, the two panels had an elegantly carved design on them, a beautiful forest scene with a running river cutting between the trees; it must have taken a very skilled carpenter to make the details stand out so clearly. As the doors cracked open Shepard could hear the scraping of plates, the cheerful laughter, the sounds of food sizzling and chairs sliding, then she was assaulted by the smells, sweet and savory. Shepard closed her eyes and took in another deep breath, her stomach flipping as it let out a small rumble, mouth beginning to water with anticipation, as she let out the held breath she turned her head to Liara. Upon hearing the Commander’s stomach growling Liara turned to Shepard as if to say something but got caught up in those expressive green eyes again, a question formed on Shepard’s lips when all of a sudden the room hit a deadening quite.

Liara blinking turned to look upon the occupants, a sea of blue and purple faces all turned and staring at them, some wide eyed with open mouths, while others merely a sly closed mouth smile, her cheeks flushed as she looked down at the ground, her lips trying to stay neutral hiding the sheepish grin threatening to show. Taking a deep breath Liara composed herself, lifted her head, her eyes lacking their normal brightness and mouth relaxed but straight, she stood tall with all of the poise expected of a dignitary and flowed across the room to a corner table near a large window with Shepard on her heels, pointing to the chair across from her she gestured for Shepard to sit down, whilst pulling up her own chair and sitting tall, hands folded in her lap. _While it looks like I gave the commandos some nice gossip after all_. Shepard looked around the room, staring at plates half eaten looking for the source of the smells when another small rumble escaped her stomach unchecked, her head ducked down slightly and reaching up to rub the back of her neck.

“Since you are our guest the kitchen staff should be out shortly with food”

Shepard sat up a little straighter and smiled at the prospect of food. True to her word the same acolyte from this morning walked out with two plates of food. Upon seeing the food one of Shepard’s eyebrows raised and lips, head tilting to the side “Pancakes?”

“I thought you love pancakes” Liara’s face scrunched up

“I do, but I was expecting maanru or something Thessian since you haven’t had it since Therum”

Liara saw Shepard’s lips edge up in a grin and was baffled “If you would rather –“

“No! This is perfect; just promise me you’ll enjoy something from home” a lopsided grin settled across Shepard’s face with bright sea foam green eyes.  

“Of course Shepard” Liara couldn't help but linger when her eyes met Shepard’s gaze. _The Commander looks dashing in her civilian clothing, I think I could get used to seeing her like this_.

“Now about these pancakes, let’s see if they taste as good as they look, though we might need more.” A confused look from Liara and she continued “If we have to fast I mean, I know it’s tradition to fast until tomorrow morning and I’m a biotic vanguard remember, food is kinda essential.”

“Did you talk with Shiala?”

“No… I um… I have a little experience with Asari traditions” A puzzled look lite up Liara’s face “I’ll explain some other time, promise”


	3. Rest In Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2 at the T'Soni estate.

                Satisfied and with a full stomach Shepard followed Liara down another stream of corridors that flowed throughout the estate. They entered a spacious room, the same cream colored walls as the rest of the estate, gorgeous hardwood wood flooring and luxurious red couches and armchairs. A beautiful stone fireplace gracing one wall, the mantle displaying a couple sculptures and candles, a large picture hung above depicting a stunning Thessian sunset. The doors of the room beyond were wide open, Shepard could see a desk with an extranet terminal, bookshelves and a round table with four chairs, though there was probably more that she could not see. There were several people already waiting in the room, all of which stood and bowed their head slightly as a sign of respect when Liara entered. Liara walked to the open doorway and turned to Shepard,

“I have a few meetings before the Ceremony, stay here with Shiala” A brief nod from Shepard and Liara turned back to the room “Councilor Tevos, it’s an honor” and with that Tevos walked with Liara to the study and the doors shut.

 Shepard stood leaning against the wall arms crossed in front of her, eyes closed and head bowed but not missing any subtle changes in the room, Shiala took up the same position on the other side of the door, looking at her with a bright curiosity.

Shiala broke the silence, “So where did you train?”

Shepard looked up, “What do you mean?”

“It’s obvious, it’s present in your stance, how you bow your head and without looking know what everyone is doing. At some point you trained with Asari Commandos, that much I’m sure of, though I do not know to what degree.” Shiala waited for a moment in silence, just watching Shepard and waiting for an answer.

With a sigh Shepard began, “Perceptive… but it wasn’t a Commando squad and it’s a bit of a story.”

“Not like we don’t have the time”

“Ok, but I warned you… Before I was born, my mother was exposed to eezo while on duty, the doctor said there should be no lasting effects, then again when I was young, around 10, I was exposed to a high concentration of eezo in an old ship yard. My mother was away on duty, no kids allowed, I was with my aunt Karin, the ship we were on the SSV Hong Kong was in dry dock on Earth and I went exploring. I found this old scrap yard, ships damaged beyond repair, and just marveled at how beautiful they were. After a little bit I started to feel light headed, vomited and fell to the ground, I called my aunt, told her where I was and she came as fast as she could. Paramedics made it to me first I guess, when I woke up I was in the medbay on the Hong Kong and still felt like shit, but at least I was alive. This time my body was forming eezo nodules along my lymphatic system, they didn’t know if it would turn into cancer or biotic abilities, thankfully it was the latter. After my mother got back from duty we discussed it for a bit, the possibility of me becoming a biotic, she suggested starting training, maybe with BAaT, but I didn’t want anything to do with it, I had no interest in leaving my home, my family. Karen had an old friend that owed her a favor so she gave her a call. Next thing you know the Hong Kong had two Asari biotics on board, they were allowed to stay and given permanent quarters in exchange for training biotic recruits. Anaia T’Meyra and her bondmate Veya T’veeri, Anaia worked with the older more advanced students while Veya taught everyone the basics. Both were former commandos as maidens though settled down together on Thessia for their matron years. Training started shortly after, lots of meditation, focus games and then my biotics manifested 4 years later, BAaT closed the following year, so it’s a good thing I wasn’t sent there. So the short answer is 4 years training prior to biotics, 4 years after both with Asari, followed by Alliance Vanguard training and N7 training.”

“Impressive, based on your skill I would have suspected that you spent much more time with your instructors or were a natural biotic.”

“Well it was a small ship so I spent a lot of time with Anaia and Veya, they taught me a lot about Asari customs, gave me a leg up in N-school by teaching me to speak Attena and High Thessian, which we were required to be able to read, and the food…” Shepard’s mouth watered just thinking about the food “They taught me how to prepare several Asari dishes, and I loved every minute of it” Shepard’s lips parted and curled upwards in a toothy smile, her eyes shone brightly at the memories.

“Is Liara aware?”

Shepard’s brow furrowed slightly, her voice picking up a playful tone “That I speak Thessian, or that I can cook?”

“Either” a playful smile dancing on Shiala’s face.

“No to the first, yes to the second, though I don’t think she knows I can cook Thessian cuisine”

“Maybe you should show her.”

                The rest of the afternoon passed in the same manner, Liara proceeded to meet with several more dignitaries while Shiala and Shepard talked and guarded the door. Shiala learned more about Shepard’s past and explained how the funeral would commence, while Shepard’s questions focused on Benezia and then Liara. Shiala started to pick up on the way Shepard’s attention and focus shifted whenever Liara was in the room, the same focus mirrored in Liara, all of a sudden Shepard’s questions were making more sense, all of the focus on Liara, hearing stories about her past, the way their body language spoke when they were in the same room, _Little Wing is in love not just lust, and they both seem quit smitten with each other_ she thought to herself with a soft smile. When the last dignitary was spoken to, Liara, Shiala and Shepard made their way outside to the beach, the sun was beginning to sink in the sky and the ceremony would begin soon.

                The beach was buzzing with quite conversation, Shepard looked around at the crowd gathered on the beach with awe, _Shiala’s right, there must be at least 10,000 people_ she thought. The sea of faces they had to walk through was not only the hues of blue and purple of the Asari, but Turians, Salarians, Hanar, Elcor, Volus and even a Krogan were mingled among them. Stealing a quick glance at Liara who was walking a just a step ahead of her and to the left Shepard almost didn’t recognize the cool confidence that Liara was exuding, Shepard cracked a smile just thinking about it, _definitely not my shy maiden right now_. The crowd parted leaving a path straight to the stage set up near the dock, it was a very simple raised white platform with a couple chairs and a microphone, Liara sat in one of the chairs whilst Shepard and Shiala took up their position behind her, Shepard looking every part of the Specter and protection detail she was.

                A tall Matriarch, a priest, took center stage and spoke about Benezia and her life. The only thing on Shepard’s mind though was Liara, the way she sat regally in the chair, head up high, staying strong for the crowd, the narrative feel on deaf ears. The Matriarch motioned for Liara to say a few words, Liara stood and every fiber of Shepard’s being was on both the crowd and Liara at the same time. She studied the way her face wrinkled, movement in the crowd, Liara’s forced smile, an Asari reaching under their jacket, the shimmer in Liara’s cloudy blue eyes, only a box of tissues, the soothing voice made Shepard’s heart flutter. The priest than offered a moment of silence as the small but ornate wooden boat was released from the dock sending Benezia’s ashes out to sea. The sun was setting, the sky glowing soft blues and purples when paper lanterns were released into the wind, filling the sky with thousands of lights, a small representation of the souls that Benezia had touched, a fraction of the memories made, and a drop in the bucket compared to all of those that mourned her. The scene unfolding in front of her caught Shepard’s gaze, it was absolutely stunning and yet heartrending, many of those present still staring off into the ocean, tears dripping down their faces, sharing precious memories of Benezia, and all because she couldn’t save her, because she had killed her, even if Liara didn’t blame her, it was still her fault, her kill. Movement dragged Shepard out of her thoughts when she saw Liara move to the end of the dock, dropping down to her knees as she watched the boat drift out toward the horizon. Shepard stood on the dock, not letting anyone pass to offer condolences to Liara, a few hung around waiting, but all left after a few moments under the Specter’s gaze and none challenged her for access.

Shiala walked over to Shepard “Hey, I’m leaving a small shadow unit of commandos here and heading back to the main house –“

“I’m not leaving her”

“You didn’t let me finish” an apologetic look from Shepard “I’m going to go back and attend to necessary security arrangements for our overnight guests that will leave tomorrow morning, I’m trusting her safety to you, try not to let her stay out too late”

A slight nod was all that Shepard offered as Shiala walked away. Most of the crowd had dissipated by nightfall, Liara still on her knees at the end of the dock, darkness all around except for the small lights illuminating the edges. Shepard silently walked to her, the chill in the air noticeable, pulling off her jacket she draped it over Liara, sitting beside her and wrapping a strong arm around her waist, pulling her tight to her chest. Liara leaned in and rested her head just under Shepard’s chin, relaxing into her embrace, Shepard resting her cheek against Liara’s crest, they sat that that for a long while.

“You must be freezing” Shepard finally said, concern etched in her voice,

“I was, yes”

“Come on, let’s get you to bed and warmed up” Shepard guided her up and they walked to the mansion, Shepard’s arm still around her waist, Liara leaning into her for support. As they reached the shore, the sky let loose and rain began to soak them both thoroughly. Going straight to Liara’s suite and maneuvering to her overnight pack Shepard pulled out her sweats and hoodie, “I’m going to go change, you need to get out of those wet close and curl up in bed.” Upon exiting the bathroom Shepard saw Liara over by the closest, her back turned toward her, Shepard’s breath hitched and she instantly pulled her gaze to the floor, rosy warmth spreading through her cheeks sending a shiver down her spine, the supple blue flesh that she longed to touch wasn’t in view long as Liara pulled on a silky green nightgown.

                After slipping on her night gown Liara turned to see a rather red looking Commander standing on the other side of the room staring at the floor, Liara’s cheeks couldn’t help but flush a deep purple as she adverted her eyes thinking to herself, _Goddess, how much did she see?_  Her hand came up to touch her forehead.  

Shepard was the first to break the awkward silence, embarrassment still in her voice “um… are you still cold?”

A nod from was all that Liara could muster

“I’ll get the light, why don’t you go lay in your nice warm bed”

                With that Liara lay in bed, Shepard not far away on the couch, feeling numb, not from the cold, though that may have been a factor but from her life, her mother, the time she would never get to spend with her and how she regretted it. Tears began to stain her face as she choked back a sob that threatened to slip out of her throat. Liara closed her eyes tight trying to clear her head and re-center herself, opening them to see piercing green eyes in the soft moonlight, concern etched across Shepard’s features.

While moving her hand to Liara’s shoulder, caressing it with her thumb, “Blue, talk to me, what are you thinking?”

Liara tensed, closing her eyes tight again, “It’s alright Shepard, it’s nothing”

Raising her hand to Liara’s face she tenderly wiped tears away “That doesn’t look like nothing, thinking about your mom again?” Liara gave a nod, Shepard sat on the bed as Liara sat up, Shepard wrapping her arms around Liara’s shoulders, squeezing them tight, Liara leaned into her as Shepard rested her cheek on Liara’s crest. After a few moments Liara’s breathing picked up a steady rhythm, unable to resist temptation further Shepard placed a feather light kiss on Liara’s forehead and laid back, Liara’s head against her collarbone as she too drifted off.

When morning came, Shepard woke first, taking delight in memorizing every freckle across Liara’s face, every line, the way her chest rose and fell with sleep, her sweet scent of Thessian Roses was intoxicating and Shepard wanted nothing more than to wake up to it every morning. Shutting her eyes once more Shepard waited for Liara to stir before attempting to move, unwilling to wake the sleeping Asari. As Liara began to wake about 20 minutes later the first thing she noticed was a heavenly scent of leather and musk she breathed in, Shepard’s scent, probably from wearing her N7 jacket all too often. Breathing the scent in deeply she began to blink her eyes in an attempt to wash the sleep from them, coming into focus were piercing clear green eyes shining with devotion, a grin spread from cheek to cheek _Goddess, I could just loose myself in her eyes_ she thought.

Shepard was the first to speak, “Good morning beautiful”

“mmm… Is it morning already?” Sleep still evident in her voice.

“We’d better start getting ready; we’re due back on the Normandy at 1300 hours”

Hiding her face in Shepard’s arm further “It feels like we just went to sleep”

“I know, but rise and shine, besides you’ve still got to meet with the Matriarch about estate plans and Shiala requested my presence this morning”

“Oh! What does Shiala want?”

A sly smile from Shepard, _now that peaked her interest… is that a hint of jealousy I detect?_ “Something to do estate security recommendations” She could see the idea working its way through Liara’s brain, considering what that really meant, the estate’s security was top notch though Shepard guessed that “estate security” really meant “Liara’s security” instead.

“You can shower first, I will be right here”

Shepard’s grin widened, teasing “Yeah, you just want 5 more minutes of sleep” a light laugh and Shepard was off.


	4. On The Road Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This are getting back to normal now that we are on the way to Virmire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mass Effect Andromeda has been keeping me busy lately but rest assured I'm still writing this.

The rest of the morning was a blur, until they were back aboard the Normandy. Liara was in her quarters behind the med bay and Shepard at the CIC setting their next destination, Virmire. She stared at the galaxy map thinking over Shiala’s final line of questioning

“Commander thank you for your opinions on the security system, now I have a request for you. Since the death of Lady Benezia Liara is now the successor to the T’soni estate and all of its assets, as such we need to be able to ensure her safety. To do so I would like to send a commando squad with her at all times.”

“I understand the concern Shiala, but we just don’t have the space on the Normandy, right now we just can’t accommodate anyone else.”

“Commander this is of the utmost importance, I will respect your wishes as it is your ship but you need to be able to guarantee her safety as she travels. I don’t see how you can do that if both of you are in the middle of a firefight”

Shepard steadied her gaze on Shiala, her face unwavering, eyes not blinking with the fire she laced into her next words “Shiala I would give my life to make sure she comes back safely.”

_Shiala stared, her gaze penetrating deep within Shepard’s eyes seemingly looking at her soul, without blinking or turning away “Let us hope that is not necessary, for that may break her just as badly”_

“Joker”

“Yes Commander”

 _Well he sounds rather professional today_ “What’s our ETA to Virmire?”

“No time soon”

 _Well never mind he’s back. Shepard growled out_ “Joker”

“Well since you had to pick a backwater planet on the other side of the galaxy with no major spaceports most pilots would tell you 48 hours, but since I’m the best pilot in the Alliance I’ll have you there in 20.”

“As you were”

“Geez Shepard, trouble in paradise?”

“Naw, just a smart ass flight lieutenant that doesn’t know how to answer his superior officer”

“And here I thought we were beyond rank” A brief pause “Doctor Chakwas just requested to see you Commander”

“Thanks Joker, I’ll go see how many needles she wants to stick me with”

Shepard made her way down the stairs and to the med bay door, with a swoosh the panels receded giving Shepard entrance. Karin was sitting at her desk with a data pad in her right hand, whilst leaning her chin against her left hand for support, obviously studying the report closely.

“Hey Aunt Karin, Joker said you wanted to see me”

“Ah, Shepard yes, I wasn’t expecting you so soon, I figured I would have to hunt you down and drag you here kicking and screaming”

“I’m not a child anymore, and I really didn’t want the crew to see you dragging me down here by my ear” Shepard chuckled slightly.

“Just like old times. Now hold still, I just need to run a couple scans to ensure you’re fit for duty” Karin pressed a command on her omni tool and its small beam started scanning Shepard from head to toe.

Shepard interjected “I only went to Thessia you know, not the backstreets of Illium or Omega. Specter protection detail on Liara was horribly uneventful”

“Well I would imagine so, but I wouldn’t put it past you to find danger somewhere, just look at Elysium, you went out for lunch and almost came back dead.”

“Point taken, but this was nothing like that. The T’Soni estate has their own commando force, all professionally trained and very capable from the limited time I spent observing them.”

Karin looked down at her omni tool, “Scans are clear, you’re free to leave”

“Alright, thanks Karin. I’m going to go check on the rest of the crew, see how they’re doing, maybe finish the mission reports and then catch some shut eye.”

“Good plan Commander, for once I approve”

Time seemed to fly by as Shepard completed her rounds. She had started with Kaidan since he was the closest to the med bay, though she had no idea how interesting his conversation was going to be.

“Maybe there is someone else you’d like to confide in ma’am”  

Kaidan’s comment caught Shepard off guard, she responded quickly more than a little sass in her voice, “Alright Alenko, off the record, permission to speak candidly cross my heart and hope to die, what are you talking about?”

Kaidan’s brows furrowed as he responded, “Ahh… Dr. T’Soni ma’am. There’s a lower deck rumor that she’s interested in you in more than a source of Prothean data. She’s a very interesting lady, ah not exactly to my tastes but ah I’ve never claimed to be very big on alien culture”

Understanding suddenly blossomed on Shepard’s face, _He’s jealous, I hope I haven’t lead him on, better be sure first_ “You seem awfully worried about my personal affairs”

“It’s just that we don’t have much downtime these days and I like being around you. I just don’t want to take up your personal time” Kaidan’s eyes softened as he spoke.

 _I have to get this sorted out now so it doesn’t cause any problems later,_ “Look Kaidan, Liara’s special to me, I don’t know where anything is going yet, we’re still figuring it out but that doesn’t mean I don’t have time to talk to the rest of the crew, to figure out where everyone is at.”

Kaidan never let his stoic face change, “Alright Commander, understood. If you don’t mind I have work to attend to.”

“Nice talking with you Kaidan”

The rest of the crew was definitely easier to talk to, Garrus was still flying high after tracking down Dr. Saleon and finally putting an end to his torturous experiments, Ashley toasted Armistice Day and they talked about her grandfather’s “legacy”, Wrex thanked Shepard again for aiding in retrieving his family’s ceremonial armor and Tali was still pouring over the geth data they had retrieved from the Armstrong Nebula. Making the decision to avoid seeing Joker right now Shepard made her way to her cabin, she would check on him and Presley when they were closer.

Shepard made her way to her cabin, sitting down at the desk she pulled out a couple data pads, thinking to herself _time to get Anderson off my back_. Taking a deep breath she began writing.  The Feros report was the easier of the two to write, she destroyed a geth drop ship anchored to the side of the Exogeni building, convinced the Exogeni employees to aid the colonists thanks to some slick talking with Ethan Jeong, sedated all of the colonists under Thorian control safely thanks to Juliana and Lizbeth Baynham, destroyed the Thorian and in the process saved Shiala thus gaining the cipher. The colony was safe and in the perfect position to recover with Exogeni taking an interest in supporting it. The Noveria report on the other hand was easy to write, but brought back strong memories. Taking down Administrator Anoleis by aiding Noveria Internal Affairs, gaining access to Peak 15 and accessing systems to fix them before transitioning to the Rift Station were all easy, even entering the Hot Labs to discover the homicidal Rachni than being attacked by Captian Ventralis who ended up being under Benezia’s employ was not difficult, what was difficult was than confronting the Matriarch herself. Shepard added the discovery of the Rachni queen and her subsequent release into the report and then focused on Benezia.

Shepard sat the data pad down and sat her elbows down on the desk in front of her, her hands resting together, eyes closed, with the bridge of her nose between her palms, thumbs wresting against her cheek bones and began rubbing her face, up and down, her finger ran up her forehead and then along each side of her nose before repeating the soothing motion that messaged her face, breathing deeply with each stroke. She finally folded her hands and let her chin sit against her thumbs and the knuckles of her index fingers letting out a deep sigh. She had to phrase what happened next properly. She had to make sure the Alliance and the Council knew the truth, knew that Matriarch Benezia was indoctrinated, that she wasn’t acting of her own free will and that she was indeed a hero, who gave her all to resist Saren and deliver pertinent information to Shepard that would help save the galaxy, instead of the villain allying herself with Saren the rouge specter that many higher officials still expected. Thankfully these rumors hadn’t made it back to the general public and were still need to know but depending on how her report was received would make all the difference in how Benezia was remembered. She slowly started typing out the events that occurred, how Benezia regained control of her body by portioning off section of her mind, the datapad with the Mu Relay’s location and how she asked her to Stop Saren, everything up until Shepard was forced to shoot her after Saren regained complete control of her mind. She finished her report with the words

“Matriarch Benezia showed not only an indomitable strength of will but also extreme loyalty, not only to her family or the Asari, but to the entire galactic community for which she sacrificed her life in order to protect from a greater evil, her last moments were those of a hero.”

By the time Shepard had finished her report it was getting late and she was tired. She laid back on top of the bed and stretched, feeling the pull in her muscles before relaxing and taking a couple deep breaths. She fell asleep almost instantly slipping off into a dreamless slumber.

Shepard woke to a growling stomach and sat up slowly, looking at the clock on the nightstand, about 3 hours until they would be at Virmire. With a sigh she stood up and walked to the shower, 10 minutes later she was heading to the mess hall to get some much needed food. The mess was empty, it was nearing the end of night shift, but not yet early enough for the next shift to be up and about yet. Shepard rummaged through the supplies and finally found what she was looking for, 10 minutes later her Farmer’s omelet was almost done. As she turned to put some bread in the toaster she saw the med bay door opening and a familiar blue figure emerged.

Liara stopped abruptly upon seeing Shepard in the kitchen, her eyes opened wide as if in shock and she was unsure of what to do. While on Thessia they had shared a few tender moments, but that was away from prying eyes, where she could be just Shepard, not the Commander. _Oh Goddess, what is the protocol here? Should I go to her, should I just go to my room?_ She spun on her heel, heading back to the sanctuary of her room, but before she could get to the med bay door she heard the softest voice calling her back.

“Liara wait, where are you going?” Shepard had stepped away from the kitchen now taking a few steps toward her.

Suddenly a lump grew in her throat, swallowing hard she stammered out a reply “I am sorry Shepard, I… I did not want to bother you –“

“Liara you weren’t bothering me, care for some breakfast” Shepard interjected, turning back toward the kitchen to retrieve the omelet.

“No that is ok Shepard, I am fine” Almost on cue a loud roar could be heard though out the mess, Liara’s cheeks flushed a deep purple, both embarrassed and shocked that her stomach would betray her in such a way.

Shepard’s face lit up in a wide smile as she chuckled, “Well it sounds like your stomach disagrees with you” placing the omelet on a plate she walked toward the table “Come on, sit. I’ll get you some toast and juice to go with it.”

Liara let out a breath that she didn’t realize she was holding with a sigh moving to sit at the table. “It looks delicious Shepard, thank you” Liara cut a small portion with her fork and knife, breathing in the heavenly scent of the food which was only bested by the savory flavors upon tasting it.

Shepard was back at the stove top cooking another omelet when she heard Liara hum in approval “Before we got to Thessia I had some supplies requisitioned so we could pick them up in port. That heavenly taste you seem to be enjoying so much is a farmer’s omelet made with eggs, ham, bacon, hash browns, onions, green peppers and cheddar cheese. I figured the crew would enjoy a few good meals, I mean it’s nothing compared to fresh ingredients that we could get if we were on Earth but still better than field rations” She walked over to Liara placing a glass of orange juice and a plate with two pieces of toast down next to her.

“Yes thank you Shepard, it is excellent”

A sly smile creeped across Shepard’s face, her eye brows raised as she spoke “Don’t you mean egg-cellent” she could help but laugh at her own joke, Liara on the other hand looked lost at Shepard’s word play “It’s a joke Liara”

“Ah another joke, how could I be so dense, you humans and your word play can be so confusing” her hand had come up to rest on her face as she spoke, but quickly dropped in favor of filling her stomach.

Shepard flipped her omelet over filling it with ingredients than promptly sat across the table from Liara with her own food and a cup of coffee, flashing a quick smile before enjoying breakfast. They ate in companionable silence; no need for words, just being in the other’s relaxing presence was enough. Finally when they were both through Liara spoke up,

“Commander, I was curious on protocol being back aboard the Normandy” Shepard’s head tilted to the side listening intently “while on Thessia I cannot help but notice that we spent much of our time together—“ Liara stopped when she heard footsteps nearby

“Is that breakfast I smell?” Alenko appeared from around the corner with a smile on his face which dropped when he noticed the couple at the table “Oh good morning Commander, Liara what has both of you up so early?”

Shepard smiled, turning her attention to Kaiden, “Yes that’s breakfast you smell, if you want it you cook it, you already missed seeing me cooking and our stomachs have us up this early, I’m surprised the growling alone didn’t wake anyone up earlier. Liara blushed a light purple thinking about her growling stomach earlier, now content and full.

“Well thanks Commander, I’ll do that”

“Alright you two I’ve got to go prep for Virmire, we’re less than a couple hours out, I’ll be in the armory if you need me” As Shepard got up Liara followed her toward the med bay, before walking by Shepard turned to Liara, “Protocol remains the same, when I’m on duty I’m the Commander, but when I’m off duty like this morning I’m just Shepard” with a smile Shepard turned and continued walking toward the elevator typing on her omni tool as she went, a crew wide message to every except for Kaiden “Alenko is cooking omelets for anyone to makes it to the mess in the next 5 minutes” she looked over the message and hit send, better him than her right now.


End file.
